By Susan McKenzie, RCRT™
I have been a Reflexology Therapist for twenty-one years. I love working with clients as I watch them transform in an hour session to a loving heap of relaxation. What I didn’t realize when I trained all those years ago, was the gift of each encounter I am blessed with. Sometimes clients come in and lie on my table with eyes closed and speak very little. Other times my clients chat throughout all or part of the session. Regardless of the flow, I always feel better for the experience of having worked with each client.
A well-established lawyer booked a Reflexology session some months ago. The lawyer was a chatty client, covering topics from post-secondary education and children to investments and investing, during the one-hour session. It was an interesting collage of topics that seeped into my subconscious. They managed to fill my being with feelings of inadequacy, on my drive home some hours later. Don’t get me wrong, I have no desire to become a lawyer, it was more about the lawyer’s establishment. We were roughly the same age, yet we had chosen different paths. I was on my third career; the lawyer was still with their first chosen profession. I thought it was interesting that I somehow managed to let the success of my client infiltrate my normally complacent feelings of the unfolding of my life. I ask you to think about that for a minute. I had allowed the success of another to affect my feelings about myself, my career and my future from a one-hour conversation. I found myself saying; “if only years ago you had figured out your current career path”,
“I guess it’s too late now.” What?!
I am aware that previously I would have allowed those feelings of inadequacy to permeate my being and hang on for weeks, maybe years. We do ourselves such a disservice when we walk this path. Many say this is Ego voicing its opinion to remind us that the status quo is where we need to stay. I tend to agree that it is Ego driving these thoughts. It is important that we understand Ego and learn to work with it.
Ego is defined as the part of the mind that mediates between the conscious and unconscious. It is responsible for reality testing and our sense of personal identity. Ego tells us the way things are and how we identify in the world. If I am a broke waitress scraping to make a decent living, then so it is. If I have a brilliant idea for an online course that could potentially change my life, Ego will remind me of the way things are and how I identify as a broke waitress scraping to make a decent living. Broke waitresses do not write courses. How could you possibly do this? You won’t have time and if you have then time, then take more shifts waitressing and make some more money to ease your financial woes. You don’t know anything about making a course. It will fail anyway. And so we listen to Ego, and we stay in the comfort of a Broke Waitress. Ego says change is not necessary.
The other side of Ego looks for something different, like opportunities outside the comfort zone. The other side of Ego is inspired and takes action. The other side of Ego says ‘it’s never too late to write that best seller or change a corner of the world with a course.’
The gift of Ego is the ability to see the contrast in life. Ego does not show you the way it has to be, but rather the way it is. We have the ability change course if we choose. If we hold hands with belief we are sure to succeed.
And what is belief? Belief is the trust, faith or confidence in someone or something, including you. “Belief in the future that awaits.” writes Patrick Ness. To me, this is the captain driving the other side of Ego. If we steer our life in the direction of our dreams and never let go of belief, our beautiful future awaits. There may be blocks along our paths, but clearing the way is just part of the journey, just move forward.